Whirlwind

journey

It’s been a month, but what a month it has been.  J and I have been planning out our cruise, and getting stuff done with work.  I’ve been traveling for work a bit, and right now I’m sitting at our offices in Wisconsin.  It’s been insanely busy, but not too stressful (which is good…normally busy = stressed in my life), and overall I’m just plugging along.

However, there have been some major changes going on!  After our failed IVF last year, we had intended on doing another cycle in February.  Then, we booked a cruise, that had us going to the Caribbean, and with the Zika virus outbreak and scare going on, we weren’t comfortable trying to get pregnant prior to going into a potential hot bed for the virus.  So, we decided to push off IVF until after we returned from the cruise, since my meds weren’t going to expire any time soon.

And that was all good and well.  I mean, it wasn’t ideal or anything, but we would have handled it.  But honestly, ever since our failed IVF, I haven’t really felt very confident in this next round working.  And, while my IVF cycle was VERY easy (I didn’t have a lot of problems with the meds or the procedure), I wasn’t really keen on putting my body through all that again for little to no payout.  J and I started talking about options, and he opened up that he wasn’t overly confident in the next IVF round working as well, so we decided to just not go forward with it.  With both of us feeling defeated before we even began, it didn’t make much sense to throw so much time and money at the issue, not to mention medical procedures that have a level of risk involved.

Which left us with a few different options.  We considered embryo adoption for a short while, but decided that we weren’t really interested in going down that path.  I am not really tied to the idea of being pregnant, only in being a mother, so at the end of the day I’d be fine skipping pregnancy altogether.  Once we discussed that, the decision was pretty clear…we were moving on to adoption!

And, with that…here we are.  We’ve started the home study process with our chosen adoption agency, and are in the midst of gathering mountains of paperwork.  Luckily, it’s all pretty easy to compile, except for our background checks from when we lived in the Netherlands.  That’s requiring a bit more finagling than I initially realized, but thankfully we have good friends who are Dutch and have been helping us out.  We’re very excited to be moving forward down this path, and can’t wait to bring home a baby!!  It feels right, which only adds to the excitement of it all.  Hopefully, the process will move smoothly and we’ll be growing our family shortly!

Much love,
K.

30 Days of Blogging: My Happy Place

happy placeIt’s the final question for my “30 Days of Blogging” Challenge!  It took much longer to complete than I initially anticipated, but sometimes the best things in life aren’t the easiest.  I feel like even though I knew the answers to all of these questions, quite a few of them really provoked a lot of thought for my response.  And introspection is a good thing to entertain, every now and then.

My last question is probably the hardest.  “Where am I happiest”…a good question, to be sure, and one that really made me step back and think before answering.

The truth of it is, I struggle to be happy.  I’m a pretty content person, and have a wide range of emotions (with quite of lot of emotional instability), but it’s hard for me to pinpoint when I’m truly happy.  I will say, when I think back to all my “happy” moments, the vast majority have included J.  He’s my rock, my emotional stability.  He’s my perfect north on a compass.  When I’m with him, I feel like I’m the most “ME” that I can be.  No matter where we are, I feel like it’s home, because he’s there.

So, in reality, I can’t pick a place I’m happiest.  With J would be my answer.  The place doesn’t matter, just the person beside me.

 

Much love,
K.

30 Days of Blogging: Relationship Status

relationshipThis seems like such a silly post topic, as most of you can gather from my various blog posts that I am married.  But…short and sweet, right!

SPOILER ALERT:  I’m married.  Yep, I said it.  Married.

J and I got married in May 2008, a year before I graduated law school.  The timeline to our relationship was not the norm, but it worked for us:

 

First Date:  March 10, 2006

Engaged:  July 22, 2006

Married:  May 16, 2008

 

A lot of people thought it was too fast to get engaged four months after meeting, but it worked for us.  Even now, six years later (six years of marriage) we’re both incredibly happy.  Marriage isn’t always easy, but it’s always worth it, and I wouldn’t change it for the world!

Much love,
K.

Six Years! Happy Anniversary, J!

Six years ago, at this time, I was sitting with my girls at the hotel, munching on goodies and drinking champagne before leaving for our hair appointments, and blissfully happy.  Everyone said that the day of our wedding would fly by, and looking back, they definitely weren’t lying.  I wasn’t nervous, but I was excited.  Excited to get the day underway, excited to leave for Hawaii the next day and enjoy 10 days of glorious relaxation, and excited for kicking off our married life together!

Our wedding wasn’t without hiccups.  The groomsmen were drunk before the ceremony even started, my father-in-law has a bad back and had downed one too many pain meds to keep his pain at bay, and my photographer was (unbeknownst to me) in the midst of a very messy divorce, and would later skip town, my wedding photographs in hand, never to be seen again.  But, six years later, none of that matters now.  This morning, I woke up next to the love of my life, and was (again) blissfully happy!  He has stood by my side (as I have stood by his) over the past eight years:  we’ve lived on 3 different continents, made job changes and weathered school graduations, opened our hearts to three adorable cats, and generally loved each other a lot over these past eight years.  It’s been a wild ride, but incredibly worth it, and I can’t think of a better man who I want to stand next to for the rest of my days.

J – I love you.  You are truly the peanut butter to my jelly, and I can’t imagine my life without you.  Here’s to many, many more years together, and to the adventure of a lifetime.

anniversary pic

Much love,
K.

Dating

After nearly six years of marriage, sometimes it’s hard for me to remember what it was like when J and I were dating.  I remember the feelings of butterflies in my stomach that would show up before he was due to arrive at my place, or the excitement that I felt just talking to him on the phone.  Our first week of getting to know each other, we spent hours just talking on the phone, learning everything we could about each other.  Those hours spent on the phone made our first date seem like it was meeting an old friend, as opposed to a stranger.   Whenever I think back on those days, I get a really big smile on my face, and I fall in love with J a little bit more (if that is even possible).

Tonight, J and I are going on a date.  A real “dinner and a movie” date.  It’s been a while for us since we’ve done this.  In the NL, we tried to go out every few weeks or so, but it didn’t always work out (though, to be fair, more often than not it did).  Work and life gets in the way.  Responsibilities that we didn’t have 8 years ago seem to crop up and take precedence over plans quickly jotted down in a planner.  Our careers have expanded and duties with work have more than doubled, and being a homeowner (as opposed to a renter) always gives you more things to do than you have time for.  But, for tonight…that’s all going by the wayside.  Because, tonight, is a date.  And tonight, we’re not going to talk about work.  We’re not going to talk about the remodel or the basement flood at home.  Tonight, we’ll go out to dinner and hold hands, talk about our plans for the future and where we want to travel this year.  And after, we’ll go to an action flick (we’re both action junkies) and I’ll cuddle into him, and we’ll spend the next two hours shoulder to shoulder, escaping reality.  Then, after, some ice cream…because that’s how we roll.  We’ll joke and laugh, and not once reach for our phones.  Because this is how date night works.

On date night…technology doesn’t exist (at least, nothing that’s distracting).  The cell phones are turned off, no one checks their email.  Stressful subjects are avoided like the plague.  It’s our time to sit back, laugh with one another, relax and reconnect.  And while our relationship is pretty damn good most of the time, on date nights…well…its spectacular.  And having the opportunity to really unplug and just BE with each other is what matters most to us.  We always says it’s not the quantity of time spent together, it’s quality.  Because I would pick an hour spent together with nothing in our way, over spending 24/7 with each other in the same room, with eyes glued to our laptops.  It means more to us…it’s the quality, hands down.

And even now, while I’m writing this, I have a secret little smile on my face.  I’m gearing up for a night out with my husband, and it’s weird to get excited to go out on a date with a man I’ve been married to for over five years.  But I am excited.  And the butterflies…they’re back.

Much love,
K.